I had wanted to blog a long time back, but couldn't find a chance to. Nothing much to blog like again, but it's another entry for the sake of blogging.
Anyway, here's a chance to wish all a happy chinese new year. This year is a no-visiting year for me, 'cause my paternal grandfather passed away just recently. I will be visiting some houses which are non-taoist though. Went to my grandmother's place yesterday, and this year's a surprising crowded year there. Usually it will be like less than 10 people around, but this year almost everyone came. Thinking: what brings them together? The festival or the knowledge that some of our kins may depart like the 2 last year? Quite a taboo to speak of such for some, but it's the truth and I hardly see anything as a taboo.
Sigh. That's it I guess, don't feel like blogging anymore, 'cause evrythime I blog, alot of worries will come gushing at me... I don't want that. For now.
Yours truely, Zhikai |4:43 PM|
Saturday, January 21, 2006
I was saying the other time that I will start feeling the reverse whenever I reach the epitome of joy and happiness. I still can't figure this phenomenum out yet, will one day be enlightened I guess, and I shall talk about it in my post.
Now, I also have got no idea what I'm feeling at the moment. A little shagged from the one long day of activities. Lessons. A little shopping with Wei Ming. Dance practice for soiree. Audition. Dinner with Hilda and Su. Bible Study (which I turned up only for the last 20 mins or so as I lost my way, AGAIN). Then it's home. Sometimes, when you are really tired, you can just forget this thing about feeling some feelings.
I was on the train just now, on my own. Then I realised I'm actually breathing. So I made an attempt to breathe. Consiously. Then I felt that breathing can be quite a tiring task. Living is quite a chore. So I shouldn't live a life wanting to live, 'cause I will be tired out if I do. Leave this job to Someone who has an upper hand, and live this life subconsiously while we focus on living this life, not just to live, but for discovering its purpose.
Ok, I gotta go eat the kiwi my dad has cut for me, like every night. Till next time, goodbye. God bless.
